Thursday, July 5, 2012

Decisions, Decisions...

With the decision for a new doctor squared away, we needed to decided what to do next. My biggest concern (the main reason for the third opinion) was whether or not I should have surgery again. After reading my records she said she did not think it was necessary given the level of endo that was found (level 2), and how recent the surgery was. With that in mind, she gave me three options:

1. Continue doing IUIs. She said that if I have no desire to do IVF and want to keep trying, I can continue doing IUIs until they find the right dosage for me.

2. Have surgery. If something has grown back, it could be impeding the IUIs. Plus, she said that if I was concerned about having a tip-top pelvis, then this would be a good option. However, as I mentioned above, she did not think this was what was the problem.

3. Move onto IVF. As she put it, "If you said to me, I'm frustrated and I want to try what has the best odds" then she would say, "Ok, let's do IVF."

She stressed that there was no "wrong" choice, again reiterated that I was young, and that any of these were a good option. She said if I was older, she would strongly discourage 1 and 2 and would recommend #3.

I had pretty much decided before we even got there what I wanted. These injectible cycles have been extremely frustrating to me (losing 2 months at a time, and neither time yielding a "good" crop of eggs). Plus, I am okay with moving to IVF eventually - so if her recommendation for continuing doing IUIs is based on a lack of desire to do IVF, then that is not the case for me.

So with that in mind, D and I took the plunge and decided that we will do IVF for our next cycle. She said we can expect retrieval and transfer to be in September.

I have a lot of emotions about this. I am petrified that it will not work and that I will be more emotionally wrecked afterward. I am worried if the Big Kahuna of fertility treatments does not work, where do I turn to next? I am second guessing my decision to switch doctors because if I am doing IVF next anyway, shouldn't I stick with the better rated clinic? But most importantly, I am excited to be taking a big step with a doctor I liked, and possibly have an end date in sight. And that is what is giving me the strength to move forward. It may be scary, but I think it is the right decision for me.


  1. I know how difficult making the decision to go to IVF is. I struggled with it for a while. I asked the "what if this doesn't work" question all the time. I still ask myself that. It is scary but I'm proud of you for conquering the decision to not only move to a new RE but to take that big step to IVF.

    Let me know if you have any questions, I've had 2 IVFs so far.

    Good luck!! :)

    1. Thanks for the support! I am scared, but it is a good scared. I probably will have a ton of questions so thanks for the offer. Now I just can't wait for everything to get started!

  2. Huge questions. Huge decisions. Huge feelings. As your (new!) RE said, there are no wrong choices here and it's not like you are making a flippant decision that you haven't thought long and hard about. Second guessing is bound to happen too, but if this feels right to both you and D, then go with it.

    I'm excited about your new doctor and your decisions to move forward- and will be right here with you every step of the way.

    1. Thanks! As scary as it is, I know it is right for us. I am glad to have you here rooting us on though (it makes the journey a tad less scary to have support!).

  3. I'm glad to read about someone else being unsure about IVF! So many people (even some doctors... *grumble*) have said to me "Why don't you just try IVF?"

    Oh I don't know, because it's expensive! Time consuming! Emotionally and physically exhausting! Hard on a relationship!

    And mostly, because none of you medical professionals can seem to find a reason why I can't get pregnant naturally anyway, so why should I jump to the end-game right now?

    I know this decision could well be in my near future, and I'm just glad to hear of someone else who is contemplating the process so thoroughly. I am also happy to read that your doctor is so understanding and accommodating! That's rare!! :)

    Good luck, and I'll be keeping an eye on your progress as September nears!

    1. Thanks for the support! I completely agree with your main reason. When my last doctor said it was not the endo keeping me from getting pregnant, I was like, "well then what the heck is it?!?" to which he never gave me a straight answer.

      Hopefully you will not have to make this decision anytime soon. I am hoping we both get our "cliche babies" during this time off :)

  4. I know it's tough moving to IVF but I've made great strides in the past month in turning toward positive thinking about it, and finding a way to be excited about it. Here's what I've come to: first off, it's not the last step. There are lots of other things to try if natural IVF doesn't work (ICSI, PGD, donor eggs, donor sperm, surrogacy, fostering, domestic adoption, international adoption, and more). Remember, IVF is as much a diagnostic procedure as a reproductive one.

    Also, IVF has much higher success rates than any other method, including natural conception! So that's pretty exciting to get to have such a great chance! I know it's scary but if you work hard to turn it around into a positive and exciting thing, it can actually be - dare I say it - kind of fun. It can be really tough too though! I don't want to sell it short. Everything Trisha said (expensive, time consuming, exhausting, emotionally draining, all that), but it's also the closest we'll have come to being pregnant in a long time. And I am SO thankful that we can physically and financially even attempt it, that's a blessing in and of itself.

    -Shelley @ Tales from the Waiting Room

    1. Thanks for stopping by and the support! I love your positive thinking. And I have to say, the stats are what I am most excited about. When the Dr. looked at me and said I would have a better than 50% chance of getting pregnant I felt like I saw a light at the end of the tunnel. It was the first time in a long time that I really believed that this could be over soon.