Monday, June 25, 2012

Planning Ahead

Cycle 15, CD4

Today was my Dr. appointment after my freakishly short luteal phase last month. Not surprising at all, I have 4 or 5 cysts so I have to take this month off. Again. I am starting to hate the injectibles even more than I hated the clomid. Even though I was reacting poorly to the Clomid, at least I was trying. Now, each cycle is costing me two months instead of one (this is not the kind of thing you want a 2 for 1 deal on) and I am still not reacting great to the meds (it is feast or famine in the egg production). So now I am feeling at something of a crossroads. The way I see it, I have several options:

B's list of totally sucky options:*


I. Take this month off and then continue on course with injectibles next month. This option has two permutations: 


A. Try naturally this month -
  • Pro: At least I am doing something toward getting knocked up. 
  • Con: Regardless of my "oh natural is great"-ness of last month, I now feel that is hippie speak and I want  my medicated cycle ASAP.

B. Go on birth control -
  • Pro: Brings this cycle of waiting to an end much more quickly then waiting for my body to naturally do something. 
  • Con: It's another month of not trying and twiddling my thumbs.

II. Take this month off and then pursue other options. This can go one of three ways:

A. Call Dr. D (my BFF) and see what other options I have -
  •  Pro: I can find out if there is a different injectible I can use so this does not happen again, or, since he wanted to do IVF next, I can see if I can skip to that instead of another (2 month) injectible cycle. 
  • Con: He is so, so condescending, and I feel he will not be receptive to my coming up with ideas on my own.

B. Go back to the original Dr. D and have surgery for my endo -
  • Pro: He recommended I come back to him before pursuing IVF since he felt that was my underlying problem. Plus,  he specializes in reproductive surgery which he said is better than doing it at a "fertility factory" (his words, not mine) where they can do surgery, but are not as experienced with it. He did amazing things for me with my first surgery in 2009 and I credit him with the lack of pain I now have. 
  • Con: He was really, really not so great at the fertility stuff and that has undermined my confidence in him.

C. Get a third opinion -
  • Pro: I have two different opinions on why I am not getting pregnant (Original Dr. D feels it is the endo, new Dr. D feels it is ovarian dysfunction). Seems to make sense to get a tie breaker. 
  • Con: I am so. freakin. tired of going to doctors. Plus, I don't even know where to go to get the third opinion since I am currently going to one of the most popular clinics in the state.

So there you have it, my 5 not-so-appealing options of what to do next. And I have no idea which one I will choose.  I am tempted to print out this list, tack it on my wall, and throw a dart at it. Wherever it lands, that is what I will do. That's how all people make important decisions in life, right?

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*Yes, I have managed to turn my fertility options into something akin to a thesis outline. Not only am I infertile, I am also a nerd.

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